Welcome to the TALES OF THE LOST SORCERER! I am Rkylfak, the Great Mage of Storms, and these are some of my most notable adventures! Buy my other book, "Tales from the Greatness of Thunder" for more of these interesting stories!
Well, first of all, I once needed to smote this one servant who forgot to cut the crust off my sandwich, because I can't eat a sandwich with the disgusting crust. I mean, who eats a sandwich with the crust on?!
Just a few decades ago, I had to fly into a storm and kill the elemental making it, 'cause I was annoyed that I didn't make the storm. You know? You learn how to make storms on demand and someone has the gall to make a storm without even telling me.
During the Renaissance, I had to kill a Duke to get a Shakespeare ticket. I don't regret a thing! Except watching the play. I'd much rather watch an orc camp raid my tower than watch that again.
Let's see. Oh, one time I found this really nice book in an auction, so I made a Tornado and had it destroy the auction house, and then after it destroyed the auction house, I took the book, only to realize I already owned it! What a funny situation!
This happened just last week, So, I was talking to this Orc in New York, and he said, "No, magic doesn't exist you insane man, get away from me, or I'll call the cops." So, I left him alone, and by that, I mean I followed him home, then I smite him with lightning. That's what he gets for messing with me!
Let's see, I was walking around an elf neighborhood, and this took place around 1936, so the Elf Civil War hadn't happened yet. Anyways, I saw this man trying to dry-clean his clothes, so I decided to go clean my robe. When I got there, I tried to put my robe in the dry-cleaner, then this imp came up and yelled something slightly insulting to me, so I started to yell back at him. This went on for a while, then I just shocked him, which caused him to explode, and the explosion made my dry-cleaner to explode, which caused all of the dry-cleaners to explode. Isn't that fun?
I once went to this small town mainly inhabited by dwarves and elves to fill up the gas on my magic carpet, and they charged me FORTY DOLLARS for ten gallons! I asked if they knew who I was, and they had the gall to say they didn't know who I was, and wouldn't make my ten gallons free. So, obviously, I had to electrocute the fuel dispenser. It caused the gas station to blow up. Funny accident, right?
Well, reader. You've reached the end, and for this achievement, I will grant you a rune, so that you may someday learn magic to be as great as me! Remember this rune, and write it on anything you don't like. It'll be explosive, and just write the rune in the air to explode it. Well, here it is! Be responsible. ᛟ