A Bridge to Burn
There he sits, a proud warrior. Broken. What has he done? I sit and stare at my body, and I grieve. Why? The body of my enemy is near, but I feel no triumph. I am consumed by the small form she trapped in a bag. Drunkenly, I rise, and stumble to her. I lift the bag and gently turn the face toward me. A child, no more than forty in human reckonings. She’s barely old enough to begin learning the language of our goddess. I sit, and silently weep. What have I done? No. What was I raised to do? Why did I listen? I must know. I rise and lift the body of the child. As for the warrior, I leave her to sink into the stone.
It takes me weeks, but I arrive at my enemy’s kingdom and lay the body at the feet of a guard. “Make sure her mother is aware of what happened. If she wishes to know what transpired, she may read this.” I hand a scroll bound with my family’s seal to the guard and turn to leave.
“You cannot leave,” the guard says.
“Oh? And why’s that?”
“You are the enemy of my Queen. It is my duty to kill you for her.”
“No. It is your duty to guard your city. I mean no harm today. Goodbye.” I dart around the corner and become a blur to all senses. I am a whisper on the wind. I am a momentary blot of darkness in the shadows of the caverns.
I arrive home after some time and enter the throne room.
“Is it done?” she asks.
“Our enemy’s Shade Widow is dead. It cost me much.”
She rolls her hand for me to go on.
“There is a bridge I swore never to cross. I wished to keep my sanity, as I would kill many. This one made me cross it. She had a child strapped to her back, and their aurae were so similar that I only knew as I felt the life leaving the child.” I pause, “Why do we kill?”
“So that we may triumph.”
“Is that so important that you would annihilate all?”
“Yes.”
“Is peace not an option?”
“Why would it be?”
“So that none on either side are killed. I have killed more than I care to count, and I have done it unflinchingly and with zeal. I made an oath to myself never to kill a child, and I JUST BROKE IT!!!” I stand there, panting and shaking. Why doesn’t she understand?
“You killed a child. And? Children are killed in war.”
“We don’t need to kill. We could all follow the goddess and not kill. It’s pointless. This death makes us weak. It makes us easier for others to kill.”
“We kill to survive.”
I sigh and turn to leave. “I’m sorry. I can’t keep doing this. I crossed a bridge I should have burned. I must atone. Goodbye, Mother.”
My sister looks at me, but says nothing. It doesn’t matter. We can read each other too well. I nod, and walk out, my steps taking on a steady cadence.
Anjeli walks into my room, leaning against the door to my personal armory. I’m packing my Knapsack of Infinity with the things I need.
“Where are you going?”
I stop.
“I have to go. I can’t keep living like this. I no longer enjoy pain the way I did.”
She sighs and sits down. “I can’t say I’m surprised. You were always fascinated with that group of Stone Dwellers who pushed us back. They had allied with other groups of them. If such weak creatures can do that, then why couldn’t we?”
“Something like that. If we could at least tolerate each other, it’d be so much easier. We could do so much.” My voice is too pleading.
“I know, Mar. No one wants to do that though.”
I simmer. “The only way to have peace is if both sides are willing. You’re right. I’m ready to go. I want to see what other people do.”
“Break her heart then. If you do, legally, you are no longer my brother. I’m sorry.”
“I understand. Goodbye.”
I now betray everything I am, ever hoped to be, and wanted to be just a week ago.
Hours later, I leave my home for the last time. One bridge crossed that I never thought I would.
The next few weeks are a complete blur of images for me. Blood, screams, and pain. I had gone insane. I could no longer hold back the revulsion of that child’s death. The denizens of the Caverns feared me. One day, I saw a ray of sunlight.
I shrink away, hissing. Slowly, as my eyes adjust, I see a spring. My mind kindles mildly. I take my shirt off and step into it. Immediately, my muscles relax, and my mind is mine again. I see an exit, where the light is bright. The wind is blowing in. I don my clothing once again and step outside.
I see clouds gathering on the horizon, the herald of a storm. I lie down and close my eyes in this new world, crossing another bridge.
There he stands, a proud warrior, newly bathed in sunlight. He has never felt its kiss, so he sits, and waits for the upcoming storm.
Goodby, Anjeli. Goodbye, Mother.